Howard Cosell and Faking An Orgasm
Now, that’s a strange combination. Howard Cosell and an orgasm. They really have nothing to do with each other, or at least for me. Those of you who are even more tilted in your thinking than I am are probably thinking that I enjoy a good vintage clip of Howard when I need…..no, no. You’re wrong. That’s not ever going to happen.
However, last night I was writing a piece about the 39th Anniversary of Monday Night Football. Yes, me. Football. Howard Cosell. All of these words are totally non-orgasmic to me but what I live my life by is very similar to Howard’s tag line: “I’m just telling it like it is.”
Perfect, Howard. I speak my mind every day and even though I’m not a huge fan of football (I’m learning….), I think you summed up what everyone should try to do a lot more of. Just say it. Life is too short to not do that and Cosell’s life reflected that. People appreciated his forwardness, even if his voice did get a little annoying. Much like me — I say it, some don’t like it and I can be very opinionated. Annoying? Yes. But I like to make sure people know how I feel. There is no crystal ball that I know of that works better than that.
So, in honor of Howard and for those of you who are wondering when the “orgasm” part is going to start, here’s my “Faking an Orgasm” post that I wrote several months ago. Thanks, Howard, for inspiring me to continue on my quest to never fake an orgasm speak my mind.
Faking an Orgasm
When was the last time you said what was really on your mind? I don’t mean the time you screamed at a waitress for your messed up order (scream at the chef and leave the messenger alone, will you?). My question is directly related to the fact that many people keep their feelings under wraps but gripe about them to others. How about saying how you really feel?
I gave up on trying to be someone I am not years ago. Divorce weakened me and strengthened me at the same time. Over the past eight years I have learned that keeping my mouth shut about things I am passionate about is not the way I want to live my life. Sometimes you just have to say “Hey, you suck and I want you to know that”.
Not saying how you really feel is like faking an orgasm. Ahhh….you were hoping I’d get to the orgasm part, weren’t you? Well, sometimes I make my point quickly and other times…well, I’m a bit slower. No two orgasms are alike, are they?
Who really wants to take a cold shower every time they hold back their feelings? Now, I am not promoting hate mongering. That’s just ugly. What I am promoting is not being afraid to say how you feel. This doesn’t mean doing your best impersonation of a trailer park trash tramp. You can, however, tell someone how you really feel without referring to your Talk Like A Truck Driver handbook.
Being direct is something I have worked on over the years. I want to leave no question in someones mind how I feel without sounding like an resentful bitch. Well, sometimes I am a resentful bitch but that’s just when I am experiencing a hot flash. I find it really refreshing when someone tells me that I’m out of line. Maybe I won’t agree with that person, but I really appreciate it when people aren’t afraid to have an opinion.
Seriously people…do you want to live life having a small orgasm or do you want to wake the neighbors?
You’re probably waiting for me to start ripping into someone right here in this post. Not going to happen. Well, not today anyway. I didn’t write this post for that reason. What inspired me to write was a conversation I overheard at the bookstore today between a young girl and her mother.
“Mom, I’d really like to get this book.”
“What do you want a book on Origami for? You’re not at all artistic.”
“I learned how to do this in art class last week. I really liked it.”
“It’s a waste of $10. Why don’t you get that Hannah Montana book?”
“I like Origami, Mom. It’s fun. I don’t want another Hannah Montana book.”
“I hope you know that I am not pleased about wasting $10 on this junk.”
“Mom, I think you need to appreciate me more.”
I wanted to hug that girl. Without even knowing her I was proud that she had the brass ones to stand up to her own mother. The negative attitude of the mother made me sick and this young lady didn’t back down.
So, are you a fan of just not making waves because life is just easier that way? Screw that. Say it….or just continue faking that orgasm and mosey along with all sorts of pent up frustration.
Read more of my opinionated self: Providence Social Media Examiner
Down goes Frazier, down goes Frazier!
Great post!! Listen up ladies! Have a great week!
That was a great post and we all need to stand up for ourselves.
I am totally with that girl! Awesome that she stood up to her mom in such a respectful way! Great re-post! I loved it! I have no problem speaking my mind. My boyfriend will tell you that! I am just tired of having to speak my mind so much! Whew…
.-= Gerlaine´s last blog ..A New Day Has Dawned =-.
Some are afraid to comment (because they are afraid to say how they feel..lol…um…that’s the point) and some aren’t going to EVER read this because of the title. Sort of my point…we judge a book by its cover and then talk behind a tree about it.
“She’s the girl who wrote about faking orgasms….” they will say to their friends. But how about saying, “You know, I hate the fact that I am afraid to say when I’m just not happy.”
Today…I’m happy. Content. Tomorrow, I’ll be busy. Tuesday I’m in court for I think the 27th time with my ex who isn’t helping to support his children. My mood then? on fire.
just say it…….life’s too short.
Did not comment back in April,
even though I liked the sentiment as much then as I do now.
“Be who you are and say what you feel…..
Because those that matter…..don’t mind.
And those that mind…..don’t matter!”
You don’t stop laughing because you grow old,
you grow old because you stop laughing!
Hmmmm three hours (or so) and you have 30 comments. This is going to be one of those legendary posts.
I have suffered since childhood for saying what I feel in most cases. I only control it during the sales cycle when it becomes something tempered, or fake, but it still comes out. I didn’t realize I was doing it though. Maybe this is why I’m generally a happy person.
Thanks again for another gem C.
I am right with you. Speak up! How else are people going to know how you feel. I encourage my kids to tell me what’s on their mind; have a conversation with me. They don’t have to agree. In fact, sometimes I find it much more interesting to listen to their opinion.
I learned just like you to speak what is on my mind and I find that people actually appreciate my honesty and the fact that I have the “brass ones” to stand up for how I feel and what I believe in. No pent up frustration here.
Now let’s get back to that orgasm and waking the neighbors
~Kimberly
Kimberly’s last blog post..Social Media Traffic Video Secrets
I would love the opportunity to tell somethone I think they suck… I think I would laugh to hard after. I’m thought of as a bold person – one who says what’s on her mind. And I don’t have a problem voicing what I think.
But then again, I make it clear that it’s what I think – not that anyone else has too. I’ve been in that situation (the girl and the Mom) and yes, my daughter won. Just because I wanted her to have a book ‘I’ liked, didn’t mean she was going to like it. Maybe that young girl should have told her Mom to buy the book for herself if she likes it so much… lol. If my daughter has interests other than the lastest teen star, then I’m for it. It expands her and gives her more individuality. Thank you for your article. LOVED IT!
…ok…from now on I will say whats on my mind…especially to you….:) However, I wonder…would it be too much if the orgasm not only wakes the neighbors but they call the police? Just wondering.
Dropped by from SITS.
I love this post. Yes, we do need to stand up for ourselves more and speak our minds. I want to hug that girl too!
Life is too short to fake it. I am a firm believer in waking the neighbors. They’ll get over it!
Okay, when I saw a blog with the handle, The Daily Blond, and the first article out of the oven was Faking An Organism, I just had to linger for a while and see what was going on. Five minutes later…Yes, yes, I agree. Speak your mind. It’s always gotten me in trouble. Maybe it’ll work for you too!
Happy trails.
Diane–that is AWESOME!! I’ve been a single Mom now for 8 years and it takes some time to become your own person again. It’s a good feeling when you can actually say what you feel.
I almost to a fault say what’s on my mind. I feel that if you hold your thoughts and feelings inside you will someday blow up! Sometimes, if I try to hold things in they just fester..and make me an angry person and I don’t like that. If I tell people what I am thinking then we can work it out together. And that goes the same with good things. I like to tell people when I am happy about something also. I think it makes for healthy living!
Jen
http://www.afterthealter.com
Hear Hear! I sooo agree!
I’m waking up the neighbors daily!
OMG you totally spoke right to me with this one. I’m another single mom who supressed herself for 17 years in a marriage but was given a reprieve in divorce court 2 years ago. My X thought anytime I spoke up or showed emotion that I was “irrational.” I have now banned that word. They are called emotions and opinions and I’m glad I got them back!
Great post – would say more but the baby just yacked on me! Awesome.
I feel so awful for that little girl in the bookstore. Who knows what creative projects the world will never know with a mom who stifles her every interest. Sad.
)
As for me, yesssss, I sure do know how to put my two cents out there nowadays. There was a time when I held back and all it got me was inner misery.
Great blog Cheryl- thanks!
Yep. I think I’ve made it clear. I say what’s on my mind.
Even to my kids.
Kind of gets me in trouble, frequently.
YES! YES! Articles like these are better than sex, cause they last. Meaningful and thought provoking, you have given a fresh perspective to being our true selves. Well behaved women rarely make history!
Go Cheryl!
Sera—keep at it. It doesn’t happen over night. I used to be afraid of what people thought of me and when I reached my mid-forties, I realized that life was speeding by so far that it was best for me to say what I really felt so I would never be misunderstood.
Your little baby is adorable!!!
What a refreshing post. I’m trying to get to this point. At times, I still worry about how stuff will come across, but I’m definitely not as bad as I used to be. I’m getting braver.
And what a bummer about that conversation in the bookstore.
So what are you trying to tell us Cheryl?
Just kidding!
I can’t get over the fact that the mom that an origami was a waste of money, but a Hannah Montana book was NOT a waste of money?
That is so wrong!
Great post GF!
You nailed it on the head here sister! I had to continue one of my previous posts cuz you totally helped me explain it. I linked you in it, and I hope it portrays what you are saying accurately
I live in the belt buckle of the Bible belt. Therefore, I’m constantly assaulted with political and religious opinions that I don’t agree with. I’ve always wondered why it’s ok for people to unblinkingly spout off their opinions, but if you disagree you’re supposed to smile politely and try to change the subject.
I don’t do that anymore. Consistent with your blog post, over the last few years, I’ve politely let people know when I disagree. It can actually lead to fruitful discussions. And sometimes not.
Great post.
Okay! You got me with that title in Twitter! LOL! Greate idea! You’re sneaky… I’m taking notes, by the way! ;o)
I totally agree with you about that little girl! How awful! I think parents need to take a look at how they stifle their kid’s creativity! This kid could go on to be a leader and not a follower! To follow an idle or become a leader… Which do you want your kid to do? Choose wisely, Mom!!
I think that kid will do just fine. I’m glad she took the bull by the horns and spoke up for herself. Good for her!
D
Excellent analogy, Blondie. Also smart marketing ploy with the title – I RUSHED right over here when I saw your post title in my blogroll this AM (smile) – One of my heviest traffic days on Free Spirit blog was when I put up the post titled, “I LOVE PROSTITUTES!” lol
I agree, not being transparent is disingenuous and leads to an unfulfilled life. Come out with it, be natch and real. It’s refreshing and liberating.
I was married to a man who made life such a challenge that I started keeping my mouth shut so as not to “make waves”. The sea was rough enough. I hated stifling myself and eventually felt like I wasn’t even me anymore. You only live once and by God I didn’t want to be remembered as some asshole’s wife who never spoke up for herself.
As long as I can remember I have been feisty and opinionated. Not mean, but boisterous.
I am a redhead after all, I have a reputation to uphold for all of us. 
Anyway, I always challenged life, opinions and the experiences of others;as a child, as a teen and as a young adult. The only time I began to wane was when I was married. Divorce fixed that; I am more me than I’ve ever been!
Thankfully my daughter is that way, too. She is always challenging, always pushing, always asking questions. I love that about her.
I want to smack that mom upside the head. She’s missing the opportunity to actually get to know her daughter, while at the same time putting her down. That’s just sad.
I was kind of worried that you were going to write something about sex, orgasm and stuffs like that.. I just can’t handle those topics right now.. Been away from my girl for so long…. LOL.. Just kidding..
This must be one of your best post.. I guess you are in a cool mood today..Since i moved from my dad’s house i have always tried to live by my rules…Can’t do that always.. There are times when i have to fake and i hate it when i fake..
Nice post!
So true that we let things “go” rather than standing up for ourselves.
I have been known to speak my mind a time or two. And, I do often use profanity to get my point across. That’s just me. I guess being married to a Union iron worker all these years has rubbed off. Hee.
I want to buy that child a bookcase of art books! Ugh. High five to this girl for not backing down!!
I am not a wave maker, but I am also not a faker. Where that plants me? I don’t know. There are things worth fighting for and others…not so much.
I hope the girl’s mom is listening now!
Can’t post chocolate, but I can say that I am know as “the can opener”. I don’t MEAN to open a can of worms, but I hate sitting back and pretending I like something when I don’t. Or when a group of people just complain amongst themselves but never bring up the issue to people who can do something about it. So I was always called the can opener. You can imagine my joy when a new person started working with us and her nickname was pebble, because she ripples the water. I think I will tell people that my nickname has officially been changed to “neighbor waker”.
Thanks for being real, TDB.
You win the Brass Ones blogger award.
I saw the orgasm “tweet” tonight and had to come on over.